Learning to be Compassionate

    It occurred to me recently that I can give everyone around me compassion except for my hubby. Okay, fine. I've known for a while, but God recently convicted me of it. One day while at work, I prayed, asking God to explain why He had me at my part-time job. Why am I at the banquet hall and not some other place of business that I would much rather prefer? He told me it was to teach me to be compassionate towards my hubby and his mental health. 

    For a long time, I have had a very toxic and archaic opinion towards mental health problems and in particular my hubby's struggle. An issue that needed to be addressed and fixed. I've had a very "just walk it off" mindset for a long time that needed to change. Because the stress, anxiety, and adrenaline high (not in a good way) I get while at the banquet hall is so bad that I can barely eat anything during the entirety of my shift. The majority of my shifts are at least ten hours. Not a very good thing by any means. So I prayed and asked God to forgive me for not being compassionate with my hubby and his mental health. Because what I feel when I am at that business is similar to what he feels regularly. As I was praying, God told me He wasn't the one I needed to apologize to. So I pulled my phone out and texted hubby, and apologized. We then talked more about it after work. I then attended my next shift at the banquet hall with "anticipation" to learn my lesson so I can get the heck out of there and find a different part-time job. I have learned over the last few years that when God says He has something that I need to learn/work on, I better get on board. I've learned that it's a whole lot easier and nicer to walk alongside God hand-in-hand and learn a lesson than to be dragged kicking and screaming.

    It has been a month now, and I can honestly say that I have learned to be compassionate with him. God and I have worked together to make me a softer person. I am still a straight-faced, serious, and intense person who only smiles when I desire, but I have learned to be more gentle towards my hubby and that's what counts.

      I will be handing in my notice to the banquet hall next week. I am excited and relieved.

    I pray this post finds you well, friend, and walking hand-in-hand with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

~Hannah