Growing up I always wanted a dog. We briefly had one when I was 10, but then she passed away. So I made do with my stuffed dog Lucky. From the age of 8 when I received Lucky and into my teen years Lucky went everywhere with me. Okay, I did not bring her to school, but everywhere I travelled she was right beside me. On long car rides my mom would lovingly use her as a neck pillow. As a child, she went everywhere with me. I would put plastic baggies on her feet, made her a harness and leash and walk her like a real dog. I would bounce her on the ground trying to make it look like she was real.
One day my family and I were walking along a suspension bridge on a hike an hour away from home. As usual, I was making Lucky walk/bounce beside me. Lucky is a Dalmatian the size of a Shih Tzu. While walking along the suspension bridge a couple with their Shih Tzu walked up behind us. Their Shi Tzu who was on a retractable leash, so they had more freedom than a standard leash came up behind Lucky and sniffed her butt thinking that she was real. A moment later everyone realized what had happened. The owners of the dog were embarrassed and apologetic. We all had a good laugh and it made for a funny and special memory that I will always remember.
After bringing Blessing home five years ago I decided that I needed a picture of Lucky, Blessing and I on the bridge. Which I now call, "Lucky's Bridge." It has taken me five years to get this picture because I live 7 hrs away from that bridge, I don't get that far north very often, and I kept forgetting to pack Lucky.
A few weeks ago I was up north visiting my parents and on my way home from my visit, I was finally able to stop and get a picture with my real and stuffed dogs.
I'm proud of myself for finally getting this picture taken. This picture represents my inner child and my adult self coming together. I'm a big believer in the concept of our "inner child." I named mine while I was in counselling years ago and am looking forward to returning to counselling shortly and working on healing some of Mini Me's (inner child) trauma. Both Mini Me and Adult Me are both proud of what this picture represents. Mini Me always wanted a dog and was content to enjoy Lucky all while knowing that one day adult me would get a dog once I was an adult and had a family of my own. And I am proud of my adult self because not only did I finally get this picture taken, but I was able to take care of Mini Me's dream of having a dog. I am also proud because I have a bad habit of saying, "I'll do it/get it next time." For example, I will be at the store doing groceries or something and see something I would like and tell myself that I will get it next time. Simply because I do not want to spend the money on it, even if I have the money to spend. I struggle to spend money on myself.
I haven't intentionally put this picture off all these years. I mainly forgot to bring Lucky with me over the last five years when travelling to my parent's place. This time though I finally remembered to pack her. On the way up north I was thinking of taking the picture before I arrived in Sudbury, but then realized that my camera batteries were dead. So I thought I would take it on the way home. when it came time to head home I was feeling homesick and just wanted to get home. So I contemplated skipping it all together. I got into the car and put the GPS on for the bridge and decided that I would decide how I felt once I arrived there. As I approached the bridge I reminded myself that it wasn't going to add that much more time to my travel and that I would still get home on time. I also reminded myself that I don't do a whole lot for myself and needed to do this. From the moment I was taking the picture and likely for the rest of my life I will be thankful, grateful and proud of myself for stopping and taking that photo.
I pray that this memory of mine triggers some happy childhood memories of yours and blesses you today.
God Bless
~Hannah
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