Learning to be Compassionate

    It occurred to me recently that I can give everyone around me compassion except for my hubby. Okay, fine. I've known for a while, but God recently convicted me of it. One day while at work, I prayed, asking God to explain why He had me at my part-time job. Why am I at the banquet hall and not some other place of business that I would much rather prefer? He told me it was to teach me to be compassionate towards my hubby and his mental health. 

    For a long time, I have had a very toxic and archaic opinion towards mental health problems and in particular my hubby's struggle. An issue that needed to be addressed and fixed. I've had a very "just walk it off" mindset for a long time that needed to change. Because the stress, anxiety, and adrenaline high (not in a good way) I get while at the banquet hall is so bad that I can barely eat anything during the entirety of my shift. The majority of my shifts are at least ten hours. Not a very good thing by any means. So I prayed and asked God to forgive me for not being compassionate with my hubby and his mental health. Because what I feel when I am at that business is similar to what he feels regularly. As I was praying, God told me He wasn't the one I needed to apologize to. So I pulled my phone out and texted hubby, and apologized. We then talked more about it after work. I then attended my next shift at the banquet hall with "anticipation" to learn my lesson so I can get the heck out of there and find a different part-time job. I have learned over the last few years that when God says He has something that I need to learn/work on, I better get on board. I've learned that it's a whole lot easier and nicer to walk alongside God hand-in-hand and learn a lesson than to be dragged kicking and screaming.

    It has been a month now, and I can honestly say that I have learned to be compassionate with him. God and I have worked together to make me a softer person. I am still a straight-faced, serious, and intense person who only smiles when I desire, but I have learned to be more gentle towards my hubby and that's what counts.

      I will be handing in my notice to the banquet hall next week. I am excited and relieved.

    I pray this post finds you well, friend, and walking hand-in-hand with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

~Hannah

Books vs Video Games

    They are one and the same. At first glance, most people would argue that books and video games are not the same and might even say that one is better than the other. They are the same in that they both have storylines, characters, and plots. Both can help you make new friends. Some are educational and can teach you things. Also, I have heard of some children who learned to read so that they could play and understand their video games.

    They have their differences as well though. Video games involve a screen where books do not. Okay, they can. Personally, I am not a fan of e-readers. I appreciate their compatibility, but personally, nothing beats holding a physical book and watching the weight of its switch from one hand to the other.

    For a long time, I thought books were superior to video games, and if I'm honest, I still do. Mainly because of my upbringing. No disrespect to my parents. My siblings and I spent very little time in front of a screen while we were growing up. We spent a lot of time outside or playing with Lego and myself my doll, and my stuffed dog. We did gain access to video games, but even then, our screen time was limited plus, we were heavily involved in sports and music from childhood and up.

    On the other hand, my hubby did have access to video games at a young age, and his love for them has grown as he grew up. He has fond memories of playing video games with his dad and siblings. This "debate" sparked from a conversation that he and I had the other day. He loves video games because not only of his childhood memories but because it allows him to be a part of the story in a more physical and hands-on way with the controller. He is able to interact with the characters and, depending on the game, has a say in how the story plays out. Books do not have that feature. The author does all the work, and we get to sit back and enjoy. He is also an introvert with social anxiety, so he enjoys being with his online community instead of the "real world."

    Where I prefer books. I did not always though. My parents along with two of my siblings enjoy reading a good book. I read on and off during my childhood and teen years. A mixture of not being a fast reader and not knowing what I enjoyed reading. Plus I had and still have a social media scrolling habit that sometimes gets in the way of diving into a book. But I am working on finding more balance. I finally found an author I enjoyed in my early 20s and have read a chunk of her work along with other authors and would now call myself an avid reader. I have found that if the author does a good job of writing their story, then I am just as involved with the characters on the page as hubby is on the screen. 

    The argument that they are the same is that they are both forms of media to be consumed. Sure, stereotypically, they are enjoyed by different crowds. Offhand, I do not know of anyone who is regularly involved in enjoying both. Correct me if I'm wrong. I don't think I have ever heard someone described as both a gamer and a reader. The point of our discussion was that neither of them is bad. Like anything in life, as long they are consumed in moderation and do not take over the rest of our lives, then they are perfectly fine. Hubby finds playing video games relaxing, and I love to unwind in bed with a book. I am trying to imagine the opposite scenario in my head right now, and not only is it funny, but weird. Anyways, the point is that everyone has their favourite form of media to consume, and sometimes we need to put our personal biases aside so that we can learn why someone thinks the way they do and likes the things that they like. My hubby and I are very different people and depending on the day it can be a good or bad thing. We try to use our differences to benefit our marriage and family.

Enjoy your long weekend friends. I know we will.

~Hannah

During Covid one of the managers at work started a photo challenge group. The first challenge was a "self portrait" that was not a selfie. Todays photo is our "family portrait" without our faces.

Happy Mother's Day!

A few days late, but such is life. Consider this as a belated Mother's Day card. Love you all. 

    Happy Mother's Day to all the moms in our lives. Mother's Day, just like Father's Day can be a tricky day for some due to strained relationships, death, etc. Some have lost their mother due to death, and some mothers have lost their children. Others never knew their mom for whatever reason. And still, other woman dreams of being a mother but cannot due to medical or other reasons. To all of you who struggle with mothers Day due to a reason listed here or something else entirely, my heart goes out to you. I am so sorry for your loss, whatever that may look like.

    Mothers are an incredibly important part of the family and society as a whole. Their first role is to carry us in their womb, and nourish us as we grow and prepare to be born. Then they bring us into the world and spend the rest of their lives loving and caring for us. While we are babies they feed us, cloth us, change us, and the list goes on forever. As we age our needs change and our relationship with our mothers changes. All while loving us today as much as they did the day they found out we were on our way. If it was not for our mothers, we would not be the men and women we are today. So if you are like me and are blessed to have a wonderful mother, don't forget to wish her a Happy Mother's Day.

    An old friend of my mother's once argued that celebrating Mother's Day was dumb. If I remember correctly, she argued that it should not take a day on the calendar for us to remember to celebrate and thank our mothers for all they do for us. Her children were all still living under her roof as well. My response to her was that it's good to take a day and celebrate our mothers. Just like their birthdays, but extra special. I also argued that when you no longer live under your parent's roof or in the same town, it becomes that much more important to celebrate our moms on mothers Day. She then tried to make an additional comment about my mom's birthday being in the same month as Mother's Day and thus why would we celebrate again. Unfortunately, my memory is fuzzy on that part of her argument. So I do not remember exactly what her point was in that statement. My mom then told me that, her kids took her out for a big dinner at a nice restaurant that year. We had a good ironic laugh.

    To those who celebrate Mother's Day with joy, Happy Mother's Day! While I was a child and into my teen years, Mother's Day was for celebrating my biological mother and that was it. I have no memory of celebrating my grandmothers or any of my aunts and now looking back I wonder why. No criticism of my mom or dad in any way, I'm sure they had their reasons or I simply do not remember. As I  gained some more life experience I realized that biological mothers are not the only "forms" of motherhood. I married into a blended family and, not only did I get a mother-in-law, but a step-mother-in-law. There are also spiritual mothers with or without children who are working in our churches and communities helping to raise the next generation of children, youth, and young adults and filling in the gaps where needed.

    Some are also blessed to be foster and adoptive mothers. You women are such a blessing. Because you have chosen to open up your hearts and home to children in need. The world is a better place because of women like you. So bless you and thank you for coming alongside families who do not have the resources to properly care for their children and need a helping hand for whatever reason.

    And last, but certainly not least. Fur mamas. Our babies may have four legs, tails, and fur, but we love them all the same. I once told someone I considered Blessing to be my child and they got rather upset because I did not birth her. Then someone else pointed out that mothers do not have to birth their children to have children. She said stepmothers do not birth their step-children but still consider them their children. I loved her argument. Not only because it validated my opinion but because it reminded me and those standing around us that you do not have to be a biological mother to love on children. That being said, the bond between a mother and her biological child is a bond like no other.

    So whatever Mother's Day looks like for you, I hope that it brings joy, memories, and loves ones together. And if it doesn't, then I pray that you would find the healing you need and long for. Family can be tricky and messy and for some, Mother's Day only amplifies that.

God Bless

~Hannah

A beautiful view on a hike last Thanksgiving.