The Best Christmas Pageant Ever

    It is a children's Christmas story by Barbara Robinson. It's told from the perspective of a little girl whose mother volunteers to direct the play after the usual director has an accident and breaks both of her legs. And the lead rules, Mary, Joseph, the wise men and the angel of the Lord are all played by six brothers and sisters who are the meanest kids in school and the town in general.

    It's a story that my mother read to my brothers, sister and I for the entirety of our childhood. Every night before bed we excitedly sat in the living room with the Christmas tree lights on while listening to mom read a chapter a night. It is one of the many traditions mom incorporated into our childhood.

    This year, Dallace Jenkins who also produced "The Chosen" made this book into a movie. He brought the book to life. I went into the theatre excited to see my childhood memories brought to life and left balling my eyes out with tears of joy.

    About halfway through the movie I started crying and didn't stop until after leaving the theatre. I was transformed back into my childhood home listening to Mom read the book all while watching it come to life on the big screen. While I was crying during a scene that wouldn't evoke tears for the average viewer, hubby looked over and asked if I was okay. With tears flowing from my eyes, I smiled and said, "Yes. Just fine." A little concerned about my makeup running, but otherwise I was fine.

    It was such a blessing to watch this book brought to life. Mr. Jenkins followed the book to a "T" and then added a little extra to the end, wrapping it up beautifully.

    My hubby, who has never read the book and therefore doesn't have the emotional connection to it that I do, had a different perspective on it. He shared how he liked that the mom who directed the play showed kindness to those who are mean and hurtful to others and demonstrated God's love. It was an angle I hadn't thought about before and was blessed by his perspective. He shared that he hoped that some unbelievers saw it and saw the love of Christ through it.

    I haven't read the book since leaving my childhood home 12 years ago. I decided it was a tradition I wanted to bring back and bring into my home. Mom blessed me with a copy of the book. And now to decide which week in December  I want to read it. Part of me wants the week right before Christmas and the overthinker in me wonders if I will have enough time and energy evey night that week to do so. Yes, I know I'm overcomplicating it.

    Anyways, to those who were blessed to grow up with the herdmans, go watch it, and if you are a cryer like me, bring tissues and wear waterproof mascara. To those who don't know the story by heart, go watch it and be blessed by a wonderful and unique retelling of the story of Jesus's birth.

    Mr. Jenkins, thank you for faithfully following the book and bringing this story to the big screen. Not all producers follow the book when making a movie, but you did. So thank you.

    Mom, thank you for creating such a simple yet special tradition for us and all the other Christmas traditions you raised us with.

    Seeing the movie and it being done properly blessed me more than I had expected. I knew right away that I wanted to journal my thoughts and process the movie through my blog. It took several days for me to be able to sit down and simply write without balling my eyes out with tears of joy. The tears were a blessing, but it's hard to see what you are writing through blurred vision. And even now, as I'm finishing typing up my thoughts three weeks after watching the movie, I'm tearing up all over again. 

Go read the book and watch the movie.

Be Blessed friend.

Merry Christmas

~Hannah

My God Given Value.

    For as long as I can remember, I have struggled with my worth; and have based my value on my ability to produce. Whether that's at work, and doing my best to work as hard and fast as possible. Or at home and the need to be busy, because Heaven forbid I sit down and watch TV when there are dishes to be done.

    As you can imagine, the enemy has been using this against me for many years. He loves to tell me the lie that I'm not worth it, especially when it comes to spending a few dollars on myself.

    My loving husband pointed out recently that this mindset has bled into my convictions of my salvation, which means that he tries to tell me that I'm not saved. I followed my mother in her walk with the Lord as a child and then took it on as my own in my teenage years. I am well aware that my salvation is a free gift from God and that all He asks is that I follow Jesus. Yes, we do work out our salvation but we don't have to work for it. And that is the key.

    Even with this knowledge, the enemy tries to tell me every week at church when the pastor makes an altar call. As you can imagine it's getting a little annoying, hearing the enemy of my soul tell me week in and week out that I'm not saved. And of course, I start questioning myself again. One day a few months ago during the altar call the pastor encouraged us that the enemy would try to convince you that you are not saved. I felt so relieved and encouraged that morning. I don't remember the sermon that day, but I remember that moment.

    Every so often I get depressive episodes where I spend the day feeling low and the enemy yells loudly that I have no value or worth. Praise the Lord these days have become fewer and further apart. I always think to myself that I should write down a bunch of Bible verses for those bad days so that when they do come I am prepared with Scripture. After a recent bad day a few weeks ago, I finally sat down and wrote out some verses. The one that the Holy Spirit used in a new and fresh way was Psalms 139:14 "I will praise You, for I am fearfully & wonderfully made Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well." I have been clinging to this verse ever since. I spent a day or two trying to decide what method to use to keep this verse on /near me at all times. My first thought was to get a tattoo. But I wasn't sold on that idea. I'm pro tattoo and have two of my own, but I wasn't sold on the sound of this idea. A day or two later I was praying about it at work and the Holy Spirit said, "Charm bracelet" I haven't been a bracelet person in years. I don't like the sound they make when they hit a table or laptop. So I don't wear them. But, when the Holy Spirit said "Charm Bracelet," I thought, "Perfect." So I went to Amazon and found a bracelet and a charm that says "Fearfully and Wonderfully Made."

    Through the help of my therapist, my loving hubby and God I have been working on my self-worth. This past week at church when the pastor made the altar call, instead of hearing the enemy's voice and questioning my salvation, I felt peace, and it was amazing. And instead of anxiously waiting for it to be finished, I just prayed and worshiped God.

    I'm sharing this today because I want to encourage anyone who has gone through the same experience or something similar. I want to encourage you that you are not alone and assuming that you did accept Jesus into your heart, repent from your sins and believe that God is who He says He is, then you are saved. If I can and it's the right time, I want to save you from years of agony and mental torture.

    I also recently did a Facebook and Instagram fast for just over a month. I also minimized my time on Pinterest. I returned to Instagram and briefly scrolled for a few minutes a couple of times. I don't have the same addiction problems with Instagram that I have with Facebook, so taking time off of it and now returning to it isn't a big deal. Facebook on the other hand was a solid addiction. But with God's help, I have conquered that addiction. I decided that after my fast from Facebook was over my plan going forward would be to log onto Facebook on days when I had a blog to post. This post was journaled but not typed up yet on Saturday. I wanted to log onto Facebook, but my post wasn't finished. I then stopped in my tracks and told myself that I did not have to "earn" my time on Facebook by posting a blog and could log on simply because I wanted to. So I sat down, logged on and hung out for 20 minutes. Then got off and felt fine. It's now Sunday evening and I can honestly say that  I have beaten my addiction and anticipate my usage to be much more respectful and reasonable going forward. I'm sharing this with you because I didn't expect the enemy to tell me that I had to earn time on social media and was able to recognize the lie and defeat it.

I pray this encourages and strengthens you today, friend. You have value, and you are worth it, in Christ.

God Bless

~Hannah

31 Things I'm Thankful For.

 In honour of my birthday, I decided to sit down and write a list of things I'm thankful for.

1. My Heavenly Father and all that He has given me.
2. My hubby. God knew exactly what I would need when He created him.
3. Blessing. My four-legged best friend. My photography and walking partner and so much more.
4. My therapist and the work God is using her to help me do. We have only had a few sessions, but I can already feel the progress, and I'm loving it.
5. My job and coworkers.
6. My two best friends.
7. The beautiful fall colours. For many years my favourite season was summer because of the warm weather and sun dresses. Over the last few years, it has changed to fall. As a photographer, I love taking pictures of the colours, and as a bonus, my birthday is in the fall.
8. My camera. To capture all of God's creation and to grow in my photography skills.
9. Pink pens and my journal to process life.
10. The freedom to publically practice my faith.
11. A roof over my head.
12. The colour pink.
13. My health.
14. Gel Nail polish
15. My sewing machine
16. My loving family, both near and far away.
17. Food to eat.
18. My balcony
19. My dishwasher
20. Electricity
21. Hot water
22. The doctors who thoroughly examined my hubby emerged recently. Yes, he is fine now. The standard blood and other such tests were not helpful, so they ordered x-rats and a CT scan and finally figured out the problem.
23. My late grandmother's chocolate zucchini recipe.
24. A full fun pretty wardrobe.
25. Our church. We have a great pastor, worship team and many other things.
26. Our young adults group through our church.
27. My developing cooking skills. I don't love to cook, but I am continuing to grow in this area.
28. My hubby's weight loss/health journey.
29. Milk Chocolate.
30. My blog and readers whom I get to bless.
31. Another year.

Here's to 31 and all that God has in store for me.

God Bless

~Hannah

Feeling blessed to capture His creation.

Next Step

    "Next Step" has been God's word to hubby and me recently as we are navigating this season of life and planning for the next season. For me, it means working through therapy, which has begun and for hubby, his grade 12 English upgrade.

    From new ministry opportunities for both of us at our church to the possibility of bringing home another dog, every time we pray over the next thing that comes up, God keeps saying, "Next Step." For now, He wants us to focus on the here and now and not work on planning for the future.

    It has been a struggle, to be honest. I'm a planner, so I'm always thinking about and planning the next thing. Maybe God is using this season to help me be more present in the moment and enjoy this season of our lives. Because, in reality, the things we have and the actions/activities we are involved in are things we once prayed for. I suspect we are all guilty of that mindset from time to time. Pray about something, plan and prepare for it, get it and then instead of enjoying it when it happens and thanking God for it, we start all over again and look for the next thing. Or is that just me?

    Thank you, Lord, for this season. Thank you for my new therapist and the progress we are making. Thank you for helping hubby finish the grade 11 English with flying colours. I pray that you will continue to help him through this grade 12 course. I pray that you would bless all who read this post and encourage them as they walk in step with you. Amen.

God Bless

~Hannah

Sitting in and enjoying this season of life. Or at least trying to. 😉

Stop Wishing Your Day Away.

    Many of us spend our workday watching the clock, waiting to go home. Or is that just me? Not just me? Okay, good. We do this even if we like our jobs.

    Yesterday, I was back in the primer booth, my favourite spot in the building. I haven't spent any real time there in ages because I have been training in the paint booth learning base and clear coat, which have been fun in their respects. But it was good to be back in my spot. By myself with an earbud in my ear listening to podcasts all day, heaven on earth as far as my workplace is concerned.

    But I was still watching the clock waiting for break time and so on. Out of habit, I suppose. A coworker encouraged me a few weeks ago to not wish my day away. She's right of course. You shouldn't spend your time waiting for the next day or the next big thing to happen. You should enjoy each day and each moment as it comes as much as possible. While I was in the primer booth, I went to check my watch and had to stop myself and remind myself to enjoy my day. I was in my booth listening to a podcast, what more could a girl ask for while working in a factory? Answer, not much. I thurally enjoy listening to podcasts, but in the primer booth is my only real opportunity to listen to them. We can't have earbuds in any other place in the building for safety reasons and I don't have much time or the ability to concentrate and listen to them in any other area of my life. Anyway, I'm not complaining, I'm just excited to have a day in the primer booth.

    I realized that even though I'm looking forward to going home at the end of the day and seeing my family, it doesn't mean that I can't enjoy my work day and be thankful for all the things God has given me and done for me. We aren't going to love every day at work, just like we won't love every day at home. But we can enjoy the majority of them and not spend our days watching the clock in anticipation of going home or doing something else. Plus, there is a good chance that you prayed for the job that you now have and therefore should be thanking God for answering that prayer instead of wanting to go home. It is a blessing to go home to a loving family, and a blessing to go to work every day. Both of which I am thankful for. So I'm going to start working on enjoying the moment more and not spending my days watching the clock while at work.

    How about you friend? Are you a clock watcher too?

    I pray this encourages and blesses you today on this Thanksgiving Monday. Hubby and I travelled up north to quickly visit my side of the family for the weekend and are now resting today to recover from all of the excitement from the weekend and in anticipation of returning to work tomorrow.

God Bless

~Hannah

Kivi Park, Sudbury, ON

Gel Nail Polish

    At the beginning of the year, I decided I was done with traditional generic nail polish. You spend an hour doing your nails only to have the polish chip in a day or two. I'm also not the girl to get her nails done at the salon. I started researching my options—gel vs Shalac. I landed on the gel. I went to Amazon and purchased a kit with everything I needed. Or so I thought. I tried it out and liked it. Soon after though, I noticed that the colour still wasn't lasting. The polish would peel off my nails a few days later.

    Eventually, through the summer I talked to a handful of people about it, including my mom's pedicurist. I discovered I needed to use a primer or a dehydrator on my nails before using a base coat. Mom's pedicurist told me that there was likely still oil in my nails, causing the polish to come off. She showed me the primer she uses and mentioned using rubbing alcohol as well before applying the base coat.

    I eventually went to Sally's Beauty to get the rest of the supplies. Before going I went on Google and double-checked what product I needed. I was under the impression that primer and dehydrator were the same thing. FYI, they aren't. I ended up walking out of Sally's Beauty with the dehydrator. Then I got home and realized that dehydrator is simply fancy rubbing alcohol and that I actually wanted primer and not dehydrator. I'm a little disappointed in Sally's Beauty. They had the perfect opportunity to upsell me on both products, but they didn't. They respected what I thought I needed and that was it. Basically, I'm thankful that they weren't pushy and at the same time wish they had been.

    On the following Monday, a coworker suggested that I just use the dehydrator and forget about the primer and see if the dehydrator would be enough. Friend, it worked. It has now been almost two full weeks and the polish is still on. My nails have grown a bit and are ready to be redone, but the polish is intact. I also struggle with brittle nails that break easily. One of the people I talked with also went to school for nails and said that doing my nails at home or at the salon would be good for them because the hard layer of gel will give my nails strength. A shield in a sense. Someone once told me that painting your nails was bad because it suffocates them and they cannot breathe. I don't know if they were correct or not. All I know is that my nails still grew while I had the gel on which suggests that they are just fine.

    I'm going to take off the polish tonight (Friday) and then when I do a hot oil treatment for my hair in the morning I will give my nails the same treatment before I give myself another manicure Saturday morning. My next step will be to work on perfecting my polish application. I tend to be a little sloppy with the nail polish brush. So I need to practice doing that better.

    I wanted to share all of this with you because I was excited to finally have answers for all my nail problems and I want to share that with you and potentially solve you nail polish problems too. And now it is time to watch my nails grow to the length I want them and in theory maintain that length with the help of regular gel manicures.

God Bless

~Hannah

Sewing For Pleasure and Not For Profit.

 For the last few weeks, I have struggled to sew for my scrunchy and scrunchy barrette business. Hubby and I have had a few rough weeks with some health issues, but even on the days when I had the time and energy to sew, I avoided it. Then finally this Saturday morning, I was trying to build a website to sell my scrunches and scrunchy barrettes. I was feeling stressed. Hubby came and asked me a question, and I lost it. I yelled a few unnecessary things. Bless my husband, I think I married a saint. After apologizing, it occurred to me that I had no desire to run a business. I don't want to worry about inventory and everything else. I just want to sew, so that's what I'm going to do. Yes, you could make the argument that I could hire someone to take care of the business side of things, and I could enjoy sewing, but I don't want to do that nor could I afford it.

I don't need or want to work more than 40 hours a week. I want to come home from work and enjoy my family and my hobbies. I'm learning to stop trying to take my hobbies that could be used for profit (sewing and photography) and simply enjoy them and if the opportunity arises, make a few bucks and bless others with them.

I made the decision around lunchtime on Saturday and since then have done more sewing than I did for weeks. I made two pillowcases for hubby and me on Saturday evening. We needed new pillows and pillowcases but Walmart didn't have any pillowcases in the right colours we wanted. So I bought a twin-size flat sheet and made pillowcases. I also made a pen holder for my journal but it didn't turn out, so I made a new one to replace it on Sunday and then made an additional one on Monday. I also made myself another scrunchy, because why not, and because I have cute fabric. Lastly, on Monday, I made a protective sleeve for my book when it rides in my purse. I also have a list of other things that I want to sew over the next little bit.

Since making my decision on Saturday, I looked at my hubby several times and said how happy I was, and am about my decision to no longer sell scrunchies, scrunchie barrette clips and other homemade goods. It was fun in the beginning and I did make a few dollars of profit, but now it's time to sew for pleasure and not for profit. Thank you to my customers for supporting my little business. You are a blessing.

Not everything is about money. God blesses us with skills and talents. Some of which will be used to provide for your family's needs and others will be for your pleasure and to bless those around you. For me, sewing will be for my pleasure and to bless others. I'm going to maintain my social media pages because it's fun to post about my latest sewing projects and encourage others. A friend of mine posted about their sewing project a year ago and it was part of my inspiration to get back into sewing. So I too will post about mine for pleasure and inspiration.

God Bless

~Hannah

It's Okay To Not Have Or Want Children.

    The topic of children has been a sensitive topic in our home since day one. We have flip-flopped between wanting and not wanting them. We have always known that logistically we are not ready to have children. We have also known for years that we were not mature enough to have them. Hubby is now mature enough, but I still have some growth to tackle.

    We brought Blessing home five years ago and love being her parents. In many ways, she is our kid and has helped show us what our parenting styles will be when we have children. I've wanted to be a mother since I was a little girl, and Blessing has done a beautiful job of playing the role of my little girl.

    Recently, hubby and I have had a few opportunities to go out for a day or afternoon and enjoy time together simply as a married couple and not as a family/parents to Blessing. It has been a blessing to go out with just the two of us and enjoy being husband and wife, for the first number of years of our marriage things were rough. We were young and had lots of growing up to do, so we didn't enjoy our marriage. Fast forward a few years, we both grew up and worked through some therapy and here we are now. I am heading back into therapy this fall and will continue working on my problems, including more growing up. We are now more in love than ever and enjoying our marriage. Yes, like every couple, we still have our bad days.

    One of our recent hesitations in having children has been the coming of the end times. Mark 13:17 "How dreadful it will be in those days for pregnant woman and nursing mothers!" In Mark chapter 13, Jesus is talking to his disciples about the end times and what will happen. Hubby and I believe the end times are on their way and thus are hesitant to have children. It will still be a few years before we have them anyway because hubby is returning to school next year and I will continue working while he is in school, so kids do not make sense.

    Last Sunday on our drive to church I told hubby that I was not ready to have kids. I'm the one who has done the most pushing on this topic from day one. And like I mentioned earlier, I've wanted to be a mom since I was five. So for me to say that I'm not ready is a big deal. Hubby breathed a sigh of relief when I told him. Because even though he now wants kids, he doesn't feel that it's right to have them in the end times but didn't want to get my hopes up and then knock them back down again. My reasoning for not wanting them at this time is that we have been enjoying our time together as husband and wife and I don't want to add to that. By no means am I saying that children are a burden or anything. They are a blessing and a gift from God. But they are still not for everyone.

    The reason why I am sharing this is to encourage young women and maybe a few young men (based on my knowledge of who reads my blog) that it's okay to not want children. Society puts a lot of pressure on young people and women especially to have children. As soon as you get married you are expected to have children. And if God has put that desire on your heart that is wonderful. But if He hasn't. God bless you too. Or if you want them but you know it's not the right time, that's cool too. But it's okay to get married and enjoy your life together. Whether that be for a few years or forever. There is no guilt or shame in not having children. Or in not wanting them. I used to be the woman who would get jealous and cry whenever a woman announced a pregnancy. I have since grown in that area and now get excited and sometimes shed a tear of joy for that woman when she announces her pregnancy.

    Anyways, ladies. I want to encourage you that it's okay to either not want children now or maybe even ever. You are not alone. Also, when people ask you when you are going to start your family, tell them you did, on your wedding day. Children don't make you a family, your marriage license and covenant with God makes you a family. Children are simply adding to the family. I love you and am praying for you.

I pray this message encourages and blesses you today friend.

God Bless

~Hannah

Your Body is the Temple of the Holy Spirit.

    1st Corinthians 6:19 "Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God and you are not your own?"

    It's a familiar verse to many. Recently the Holy Spirit reminded me of the important truth behind this verse. I have known this verse for most of my life but never really thought about all the implications surrounding it. One of which is the need to care for my body and seek medical attention when needed and not simply ignore my body telling me it needs servicing.

    Hubby and I were chatting with someone after church a few weeks ago and the principle of our bodies being a temple and being considerate of what we eat came up and that we should be mindful of what we eat.

    There are many different aspects to this Bible verse. The one that hits home the hardest now is my need to care for my physical health better. I'm the person who blatantly ignores my "check engine" light and says, "I'll be fine." A few weeks ago, I woke up on my sister's couch on my way home from my parent's house after a week-long visit. I chose the couch instead of a bed because the couch was closest to the front door and I wanted to sneak out at 3 am and finish the drive home. So I got up at 3 am and was back on the road by 3:30 am. I discovered a knot in my shoulder blade. I thought little of it other than it was funny because my sister mentioned having a knot in the same shoulder the night before. It's not the first time I had a knot there so I ignored it and finished my drive home. About an hr and a half from home, I started to feel a pain in my chest. By the time I got home, taking a deep breath was very painful. I ended up calling in sick to work on Monday because I was still in pain and didn't know why. Later that day I thought that I had a series of knots ranging from my shoulder blade, under my armpit and my chest. I was avoiding making a massage appointment for the knots because a) I'm stubborn and b) they are expensive. A week later, during the long weekend, the pain changed and it now felt like the pain I had experienced years ago when I popped my rib out. I didn't think it was my rib originally because I didn't feel a pop and because the first time it happened there was an obvious pop, so I assumed that ribs always make a popping motion when they come out of place. Turn out they don't and I should stop assuming things. The pain changing was the nerve becoming inflamed and angry. Ironically I tell people not to assume and yet here I am doing just that.

    I finally made a chiropractor appointment and got it put back into place. Then I accidentally popped it out that night. I had already booked a follow-up appointment at the end of the week and with everything going on with hubby and his rash I left the rib out of place for another week and waited for my next appointment.

    Friday finally arrived and I got it fixed again and then spent the weekend figuring out what movements to do and not to do. I started practicing actively listening to my body. When I felt the need for rest and a heating pad I took a break and when I felt the need to move I moved. My chiropractor said I would be in pain for a while because there is a nerve that runs along the top of one of the ribs that I popped out of place. Because it was out of place for an extended amount of time the nerve was inflamed and angry. Monday morning came along and my ribs still felt tender, but as the day went on I could feel the rib and nerve calming down and settling back into their respective places. By Wednesday I had all but forgotten to watch the movement of my torso and the nerve pain was almost gone.

    The moral of the story. Is that if I hadn't been so stubborn, I could have avoided three weeks of pain. On Wednesday I felt something in my back where the rib popped out in the first place, I wasn't sure if it was a knot or the rib coming back out of place, so I quickly made an appointment for this coming Monday. I'm practicing listening to my body and taking care of God's temple properly.

    Rereading this verse has reminded me of all the other ways God calls us to care for our bodies and renewed my perspective on my health. Particularly in regards to food and exercise and that on the days when I don't want to make the "right" choices, by making the right choices, I'm honouring and blessing God and myself.

    How about you friend? Are you honouring God with your temple and listening to your body when it tells you what it needs? I pray that you are or that you start now like I am. I pray this blesses and encourages you today.

Happy Saturday friend.

God Bless

~Hannah

The Spirit of Overwhelm

    It has been a rough week. On Tuesday, hubby discovered a rash on his finger that spread to spots on his arms and legs. At the time we didn't know what it was which made him concerned, especially about it spreading to me, which meant that we started going through much more bedding and towels than normal, which meant that the laundry pile was growing faster than I could wash it.

    Enter overwhelm. I quickly started feeling very overwhelmed by all the laundry. I would go to work and do my job. then I came home and did laundry for the evening. Thankfully that only lasted two nights, but between those two evenings, I did six or seven large loads of laundry. I also didn't know how long it would last. We hadn't seen the doctor yet so we didn't know what the problem was, or how to fix it. Would the pile maintain its size for a week or would we be fine and it would end after seeing the doctor? Needless to say, we were both anxious for the answer. I was so overwhelmed that I wasn't able to think or do anything else. Hubby was equally stressed because he didn't know what was happening to his body.

    For two nights I went to the shop and did several large loads of laundry. Work kept me distracted during the day, but as soon as I arrived home the feeling of overwhelm would hit me like a ton of bricks. No, I was never mad about the excess laundry. I was upset that I had to care for hubby but that's a whole other issue. I was simply overwhelmed by the pile. Thankfully the pile did come to an end after the dr apt. Looking back it was only two nights of endless laundry and overwhelm, but when you are in the middle of it and have no idea when it will end, it's hard.

    On Friday morning, after arriving at work I was feeling very overwhelmed again. I don't recall if the Holy Spirit prompted me or if I thought it on my own. But I remembered how we as believers don't fight our battles on a human level but on a spiritual level. So I decided it was time to pray and send the spirit of overwhelm packing. And it did. My heart and mind felt clean and clear again, allowing me to enjoy the rest of my day. And make a grocery list and menu for the next week. Usually, that's Thursday's chore, but on Thursday my brain was in laundry mode and nothing else.

    We had an apt with a walk-in clinic on Friday afternoon where we got helpful answers and a treatment plan. That appointment relieved all of our anxiety. We still had some relational stresses to deal with that were a result of the rash. but over time they were relieved.

    It has now been just over a week since this all happened. Hubby's rash is cleared up and the treatment plan has come to an end and life has returned to normal.

    The moral of the story friend is to pray. Something I'm preaching to myself as I type this up as well. Yes, I remembered to pray on that Friday morning over the spirit of overwhelm, but we also need to remember to pray about everything that is going on in our lives on a daily basis and to remember that we are not fighting against man, but against the spiritual realm. Ephesians 6:10- 18 "Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armour of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the word of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints."

God Bless

~Hannah

Hubby and I took a day trip to Goderich yesterday and enjoyed their beautiful beach.

Lucky's Bridge

    Growing up I always wanted a dog. We briefly had one when I was 10, but then she passed away. So I made do with my stuffed dog Lucky. From the age of 8 when I received Lucky and into my teen years Lucky went everywhere with me. Okay, I did not bring her to school, but everywhere I travelled she was right beside me. On long car rides my mom would lovingly use her as a neck pillow. As a child, she went everywhere with me. I would put plastic baggies on her feet, made her a harness and leash and walk her like a real dog. I would bounce her on the ground trying to make it look like she was real.

    One day my family and I were walking along a suspension bridge on a hike an hour away from home. As usual, I was making Lucky walk/bounce beside me. Lucky is a Dalmatian the size of a Shih Tzu. While walking along the suspension bridge a couple with their Shih Tzu walked up behind us. Their Shi Tzu who was on a retractable leash, so they had more freedom than a standard leash came up behind Lucky and sniffed her butt thinking that she was real. A moment later everyone realized what had happened. The owners of the dog were embarrassed and apologetic. We all had a good laugh and it made for a funny and special memory that I will always remember.

    After bringing Blessing home five years ago I decided that I needed a picture of Lucky, Blessing and I on the bridge. Which I now call, "Lucky's Bridge." It has taken me five years to get this picture because I live 7 hrs away from that bridge, I don't get that far north very often, and I kept forgetting to pack Lucky.

    A few weeks ago I was up north visiting my parents and on my way home from my visit, I was finally able to stop and get a picture with my real and stuffed dogs.

    I'm proud of myself for finally getting this picture taken. This picture represents my inner child and my adult self coming together. I'm a big believer in the concept of our "inner child." I named mine while I was in counselling years ago and am looking forward to returning to counselling shortly and working on healing some of Mini Me's (inner child) trauma. Both Mini Me and Adult Me are both proud of what this picture represents. Mini Me always wanted a dog and was content to enjoy Lucky all while knowing that one day adult me would get a dog once I was an adult and had a family of my own. And I am proud of my adult self because not only did I finally get this picture taken, but I was able to take care of Mini Me's dream of having a dog. I am also proud because I have a bad habit of saying, "I'll do it/get it next time." For example, I will be at the store doing groceries or something and see something I would like and tell myself that I will get it next time. Simply because I do not want to spend the money on it, even if I have the money to spend. I struggle to spend money on myself.

    I haven't intentionally put this picture off all these years. I mainly forgot to bring Lucky with me over the last five years when travelling to my parent's place. This time though I finally remembered to pack her. On the way up north I was thinking of taking the picture before I arrived in Sudbury, but then realized that my camera batteries were dead. So I thought I would take it on the way home. when it came time to head home I was feeling homesick and just wanted to get home. So I contemplated skipping it all together. I got into the car and put the GPS on for the bridge and decided that I would decide how I felt once I arrived there. As I approached the bridge I reminded myself that it wasn't going to add that much more time to my travel and that I would still get home on time. I also reminded myself that I don't do a whole lot for myself and needed to do this. From the moment I was taking the picture and likely for the rest of my life I will be thankful, grateful and proud of myself for stopping and taking that photo.

I pray that this memory of mine triggers some happy childhood memories of yours and blesses you today.

God Bless

~Hannah

Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

    About a month ago the Lord put it on my heart to start a small business of making and selling scrunchies and barrette scrunchies. I added in the Wristlet Keychains. I had to wait a few weeks until I had a few extra bucks to buy supplies. As much as it annoyed me to wait it allowed the desire to take root. I had some supplies already on hand and made a few for my best friends and myself. Looking back, I should have spent that time designing a logo and all those logistical things, instead of just daydreaming and counting down the days until I could go shopping.

    Finally, last weekend I bought some of the supplies and started sewing. Little by little this past week I have been adding to my inventory. It's finally becoming real and no longer just an idea.

    Over the last few days, I have spent some time thinking about the particulars. Things I hadn't thought through yet. Like what colours I will offer regularly and how much time I want /can devote to it regularly. I was having a hard time deciding what colours I wanted to offer consistently. I wanted to offer my favourite colours and a few others to ensure I cover a broad range of customers, but not offer so many colours that I overwhelm myself. I should have decided that before I went fabric shopping, but I didn't. I simply bought a variety of colours. I was overthinking about it at work and getting a little stressed about it. I then reminded myself that worry and anxiety are not from the Lord, but this dream is. So I put away the anxiety and made a decision. Which I am happy with.

    Then I was thinking about how much time I should dedicate to it. Then either my mind or the Holy Spirit reminded me that as much as I put into it, I will get in return. Which has given me peace about putting in as much as possible but not so much that it affects my family life. 

    I decided last week that because I consider it a job and no longer just a hobby, I will not sew on Sundays. If I do sew on Sunday, it will be a personal project and not for sale. God gifted Sundays to us. We thank Him for that gift by resting from our regular work on Sundays. So, no sewing for profit on Sundays. I also tithe the first 10% of my sales. Hubby and I believe in the Bible and the principles of tithing from our income. So, I am tithing off of this income as well. I don't share this tithing part with you to brag, I'm sharing because I am a believer and as a believer I believe differently than unbelievers. Plus, lots of people like to shop local and believers like to shop from and support other believer's businesses. So I am announcing it here and it will be evident in my marketing. God provides financially for us and in return we return the first 10% to Him and then use the rest to take care of our family and those around us. I feel that tithing through this little side hustle of mine is even more important in a sense because he gave me the idea/desire and I want to thank Him for it. Yes, I'm grateful for my day job and how combined with my hubby's income it takes care of my family. But that job is simply a job, versus something that I enjoy and do on my own time.

    At this time I will be selling through Instagram and Facebook. I was thinking of using Etsy as well but for now, I will stick with these two platforms and see what the Lord does. I'm excited to have these two social media pages looking pretty and ready for business early this week.

Hope to see you there, friend.

Until then,

God Bless

~Hannah

Haven't made my logo yet, so a pretty tree line from last fall.

Don't Skip Your Morning Bible Reading Time.

    Oh my goodness, what a day. Boring and dragging. Work is fine, the tasks that I am completing are not boring or irritating or anything. But I'm bored. Music and podcasts are not satisfying. It's Friday and payday. You would think I would be in a great mood. But I'm not.

    Unfortunately, I did not get into the Word of God today. Hubby and I had a really late night last night and I decided to sleep in a bit which took away my time in my Bible and my housework time. I decided I would be so tired that I wouldn't take anything in while reading my Bible anyway, so extra sleep was a better idea. So I slept for an hour and then got ready for work. It's been a struggle all morning. The first chunk of the day dragged on terribly.

    Then, when I had a minute, I decided to journal my thoughts on my notepad on my phone.

    Holy Spirit reminded me of a podcast that I listened to a while ago and one of the hosts mentioned that the days when she doesn't get into her Bible in the morning, her day is off. I then remembered that I skipped my Bible reading time this morning too. I opened up my Bible app and listened to the book of Daniel. Instantly the icky feeling of boredom and everything else that I couldn't quite put my finger on were gone. I looked at the clock shortly after and was pleasantly surprised to see a chunk of time had passed getting me that much closer to the end of my work day.

    It was 10 am when I looked at the clock, meaning my work day was half done and we were an hour away from lunch. Before I looked at the clock I was feeling hungry and thought, "Oh great, I'm hungry and it's probably two hours from lunch," then I saw the clock and was relieved and excited that it was only an hour away from lunch and that my hunger was reasonable.

    The moral of the story is don't skip out on Bible reading time in favour of sleep.

    Heck, I didn't put two and two together, but even our few minutes together this morning before hubby brought me to work were rough. We have barely argued or anything recently and this morning I threw a slight hissy fit which resulted in some frustration for both of us.

So, read your Bible. It makes all the difference.

I pray this encourages you today, friend.

God Bless

~Hannah

Downtown, Wallaceburg, ON

Thankful For The Bad Days.

    Thankful for the bad days. An odd sentiment I know. But without the bad days, we can't say how good the good days are. Today was a bad day. The day didn't start quite the way I had hoped and it quickly went downhill landing in a depressive episode. I did manage to get a lot of stuff done considering. I have learned not to let my emotional state control my productivity and that I can either lay on the couch and feel bad or get stuff done and still feel bad but at least my to-do list is getting checked off. I couldn't do what I wanted to do, which was sewing. But, I did get today's housework chore and tomorrow's chores done along with most of the laundry washed and dried. So it was a productive day, just not an emotionally good day. I'm trying to remind myself that because I am ahead on housework I will have more time and energy this week to dig into my next sewing project and learn a new photography skill that I need to add to my repertoire.

    While walking Blessing tonight and thanking God for the bad days I was also thinking about how we need all the different opposites. Not only do we need the bad days, so that we can know how good the good days are. But we also need bigger/heavier people and smaller people. If we didn't have both then no one would know that they are bigger or smaller because they would not have anything to compare their size to. Hear me out, I'm not talking Instagram comparison, I'm talking healthy realistic comparison. I wouldn't know how small I am unless I had someone bigger to compare myself to. If we were all one size we wouldn't know what size we are. I'm also short, but I only know that because of being around taller people.

    Food is also another category where we need both. We need McDonald's to know just how healthy a garden salad is and how good you feel after eating it.

    We need both sides of all the categories to appreciate and know the difference between each of these things.

    That being said, bad days are not nice at the moment, I'd much rather be in a good mood than on the verge of tears. But that's life sometimes. We also need the bad days so that we remember to rely on the Lord. God also allows hard times and bad things to happen so that not only do we learn to rely on Him, but also so that He can display  His power and majesty in our lives. Because it's on our worst days when the doctor gives us bad news and we have to rely on Him all the more for our strength that we see His power. It is on our medium bad days when our emotions are a mess that we get to be reminded that we are not simply robots who go to work, pay bills, eat and sleep. It's on these days that we are reminded that we are human and experience God-given emotions.

    So the next time you are having a bad day, as hard as it is, praise the Lord. Thank Him for the bad day. Then start thanking Him for all your blessings and start defeating the lies of the enemy. I know it's not easy or fun, but not everything in life is.

God Bless

~Hannah

Distracted.

    "Father, forgive me for being distracted. More and more lately I find my mind wandering during the worship set at church. My mind has been wandering off and thinking about clothing and outfit ideas or admiring the outfits of the worship team. Last week my mind was wondering and thinking about my new sewing business idea and the different colour sets that I want to make my products into. All good, wonderful things Lord. But distracting nonetheless. I am singing along and yet my mind wanders off. Once the sermon starts and I start taking notes, my brain focuses and I start soaking in the message. Only when we are standing and worshiping through song does my mind wonder."

    After praying this prayer I started thinking through my situation and trying to analyze it. I thought about how last week I prayed about listening to my hubby talk about his hobbies and how I need to do the opposite of what I am currently doing and listen attentively and care. Someone reminded me to listen because I care about my hubby. Not because I care about the topic. That helped a lot. I spent the next week listening to him a whole lot better. Then I fell off the wagon a bit but I'm back on it now. Basically, I was thinking about how I started practicing doing the opposite of what I had been doing with hubby and how it was working, so I was wondering if I could do the same with the worship music at church. I love worship music, and I have always thought of it as one of the ways that I connect with God.

A few minutes later...

    Holy Spirit: "Eve was tempted by the serpent with things that were desirable and in and of themselves were not bad."

    Because the enemy is sneaky and likes to sneak into our brains and trip us up on small stuff so we won't notice and then all of a sudden, he is tripping us up on big things.

    This Sunday I directed my thoughts a little better and sang the songs over myself. One of the songs we sang says, "I sought the Lord and He heard and He answered." and then repeats several times. Every time we sang that line I reminded myself of a time when I prayed and He answered. Like the prayer, I prayed about my hubby before he asked me to be his girl. I had casually dated a few guys before meeting hubby. When I got to Bible College and was tired of casually dating, I noticed hubby. The cute guy at the end of my table during the welcome dinner. I wasn't planning to date at that college. I figured I would date once I transferred to the next school the following year. A story for another day. Anyway, when I started crushing on hubby, I asked God to take away my feelings if he wasn't the one. Long story short, next to my salvation, he is my favourite answered prayer and biggest blessing.

    I also reminded myself of other answered prayers. Like when God told me what to name our dog, Blessing and many other prayers. As I practiced reminding myself of these answered prayers, the song and the worship became that much more rich for me. Best of all, I was no longer distracted. I was now meditating on the goodness and faithfulness of my Lord and Savior.

    Do you struggle with paying attention during worship or any other time during your church service on Sunday, friend? If so, I pray this encourages you in your walk with Christ.

God Bless

~Hannah

To Everything There Is A Season.

    Last night (Monday night), I worked my last shift at the restaurant. Hubby and I decided that it was time for me to quit that job. And then he had to convince me to do it. I'm a little stubborn. ;) We decided we didn't need it anymore, but I'm stubborn and kept working anyway. So I put my notice in and worked my last three shifts.

    Monday afternoon, I was feeling pretty neutral about my last shift. Once I arrived at the restaurant, I started getting excited. It was a good night at the restaurant, but I'm so glad to be done.

    I texted my mom and sister as I walked out at the end of the night. I talked about one chapter closing and another exciting one opening. God is blessing my photography business and put on my heart the desire to start sewing and selling scrunchies, barrette scrunchies and other things. Both of which I am excited for.

    I drove home happy and satisfied.

    As I unlocked the door to get into our apartment building, I thought about the fact that I was now down to one paycheck. The thought brought relief, gratitude and excitement. A weight had been lifted off my shoulders, and I wanted to cry. I'm excited to have my Monday night back and the energy that goes with that. I am excited to have my evenings back and do with them as I please. (Yes, it was only one night a week, but the next evening, I would spend it on the couch tired). I am grateful for this past season and what it did for my family, and I am excited for this next season and what God has in store for my family.

    I am also proud of myself for holding a second job for a year and a half (banquet hall for six months and then dishwasher job for a year). And I am proud of myself for putting in my notice and walking away.

    Ecclesiastes 3:1 KJV "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:"

God Bless

~Hannah