This past summer, my husband's step-grandmother found some beautiful red fabric at the second-hand store she volunteers at and thought I would like to make myself a skirt for Christmas out of it. She was right.
I decided I wanted to try my hand at making a dress for Christmas this year. So I found a pattern online and got started. I had to print out the pattern and assemble it like a puzzle. The pattern came with a little 5cm square, and if the square measured properly after printing it, then the pattern was to scale. It wasn't. But I ignored it and kept going. I didn't know it would affect the dress. Looking back, I should have researched how to deal with that, but I didn’t. Lesson learned.
I quickly figured out that the pattern and instructions were not well done and left a lot of information out. In their defense, the difficulty level was intermediate. I am a beginner, trying to become an intermediate seamstress. So I started cutting out the pieces and sewing them together. After four seams on the bodice (top part), I realized I did them wrong and had to pick them all out and redo them. This would soon become a pattern for the whole dress. Sew a seam and pick it out. But I kept going and fought hard. I wanted it ready for hubby's staff party. So I fought, and I fought, and I fought. I was determined.
The staff party arrived, and it wasn't finished. I was upset and disappointed. I had 'failed'. Mom encouraged me to take a break. After a day or two, my emotions were clear again, and I started to wonder if Mom and I could fix it when we visited my parents for New Year's. We agreed that there was a good chance, so I put it out of my mind until it was time to head North.
The day before leaving for Sudbury, the weather got bad, and we prayed. The Holy Spirit said no traveling. We were to stay put. Epic gut punch. It's hard living a full day's drive from my side of the family. Yes, I know others live further from their extended family. But whether it's a day's drive, across the country, or another country entirely,
It's hard.
Anyway, I gave it another day to clear my head again. That night I couldn't sleep. So I put the dress on and started examining all the parts that needed fixing, and wondering what to do. I put it on and looked in the mirror. I took a mental inventory of how it looked and felt. There were some seams that didn’t match the way I wanted them to, and it was tight in all the wrong places. I was going to have to cut out new pieces to replace ones that didn’t fit, or risk having patches all over the place. I didn’t want that look, nor did I have enough fabric to keep going. I was “giving up.” I went back to bed and told hubby. He encouraged me not walk away from it and not give up. I said I would give it one more try. The next morning, I examined one of the seams to see if I could fix it and then make a decision from there. I had to let a seam out a bit, but I didn't have enough seam allowance to do it. And I didn't want to just put a patch in it. I decided then and there that it was truly over. I had 'failed,' not for lack of trying, though. It was a combination of a bad pattern, a bad printing job, and my skill set. So I chopped off the bodice and finished the skirt portion, and made it into a nice skirt.
I don't really consider it a fail, though. Yes, the dress did not turn out, so in that regard, I failed. But, I also learned so much in the process, and that's what matters. “Failing at something doesn’t make you a failure; the only way you can fail is to quit trying.” (Joyce Meyers, Authentically, Uniqually You - page 55) Did I quite that particular bodice pattern? Yes, and then redirected to another pattern and succeeded. Since then, I have made another dress that I still don’t completely love, but it turned out much better than the first one. In the book that I just quoted, Myers talks about people who failed their way to success, and that's what I’m doing now. One dress pattern at a time.
I learned about patterns and what makes a good vs bad pattern. I learned about how to properly cut out a pattern. Mom also reminded me about snipping the edges when you want the fabric to bend nicely. For around your neck and bodice. I learned about the shapes of pattern pieces.
New Year’s Eve, I went to Fabricland to get a pattern for my next dress, and not only found out that Fabricland will no longer be receiving patterns. The company that makes them is no longer making/ selling them. Another customer in the store mentioned getting patterns online. I told her that I tried, and it didn't work out. I briefly explained the pattern legend and how it wasn't the right size. She said that when that happens to her, she simply adds more fabric to her pieces. I didn't bother telling her that I was still very new to patterns. I did take her advice to heart, though, and if I run into the same problem again, I will know what to do.
While I was in the process of making the dress, a couple of people wondered if I would burn the pattern after I was done with it. I told them that I wanted to finish the dress and then make it again in a few months, and master it. I have since decided not redo that pattern because I now have a better pattern for the same dress style. So why bother wasting time on a bad pattern when I could use a good one and get a nice dress out of it? I originally wanted to redo the pattern to prove a point. That I’m a good seamstress. But I already know that and am still learning and expanding my knowledge/skill set.
On New Year's Eve, before I went to Fabricland and after learning that I was officially 'throwing in the towel' on this dress, I decided that I needed to boost my confidence by sewing a bodice. I watched a video last night explaining how to make your own pattern for a bodice. It looked like a good video, so I thought I would try it out. It worked. The armpits were a little wonky (I don't have the tool the girl in the video does for making the perfect armpit shape), but otherwise, it fit perfectly, and my confidence was boosted.
So yes, my Christmas dress did not turn out in the end. And some might say that I failed. Heck, I was saying it at first. Google's definition of failure is: lack of success. Sure, the dress itself wasn't successful, but I was successful in learning new things, and I can still salvage the skirt portion and add it to my collection of skirts. So all is not lost.
I'm also working on speaking life over myself this year. When I say that I failed in making this dress, it does hurt. I’m working on reminding myself that there is a difference between failing a project and being a failure. The difference is mindset and not letting one bad project derail you entirely.
So, the next time you are working on a project, and it fails. Take it in stride and learn from it. As nice as it is to succeed at a project, and it is. I expect we learn more when it doesn’t work. So I guess I hope you both fail and succeed on your future projects.
God bless
~Hannah
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