During our last week at work before Christmas, we had a few coworkers from plant 7 come over and help out our buffing department. After I finished painting for the day, I discovered that one of our helpers was in my spot. So I took the spot across from them. I didn't know who was in 'my spot,' but I was hoping it was a new young lady whom I didn't know and could visit with. Well, God is good, and it was her. We introduced ourselves and started chatting. I quickly learned that she had gotten married the previous summer at the age of 21. That was how old I was when my husband and I got married. I then told her I was 32 and just celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary this past summer. It was like looking in the mirror at a taller version of myself. She then asked if I had any advice. I thought, 'Oh boy! Do I ever!' 😀 I first asked if she was a believer in our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. Praise the Lord, she said yes. Because the advice I would give an unbeliever would be different than what I would say to a young woman of God who is now blessed to be a wife.
The first chunk of advice I gave her was about things I had done wrong and suggested she not repeat. I then sprinkled in a handful of things that she should do. She then started giving me scenarios and asked how I would handle them. Some of which I had to take a few minutes and think about a good, helpful answer. I was encouraged to see her asking for good/mature advice. We quickly exchanged phone numbers, and I started texting her advice as I thought about it. We then spent the next couple of days working together, and I enjoyed answering questions and making suggestions.
I was and still am loving having someone to pour that advice into. Like any marriage, we have had our good and bad seasons, and I am grateful for both. I have wondered for a few years if God would bring someone along that I could pour into and encourage a young wife. I am a big believer that God allows us to go through the hard seasons so that we can pour into others and encourage them when they go through their trials. Having someone to give advice to who is also a woman of God has blessed me so much. I never imagined being so excited to tell someone about many of the ways I had failed as a wife and a few tips to bless and build up her marriage. When we first got married, I never thought to ask anyone for advice. I guess I figured I knew what I was doing. In reality, I had no idea. But I was very stubborn back then and would probably not have taken any advice anyway. I’m a little less stubborn now, and I do accept marital advice when it is given.
Of course, I don't have all the answers, and any wife who has been married longer than I have would have more. I also suspect that those who got married later in life or remarried for whatever reason would also have different advice. As you would expect. So it was really cool to see a young woman of God who was a new bride and married her hubby at the same age I was when I married my hubby.
I told her about my blog and how she might be blessed by it as well. I then told her that I had been enjoying advising and encouraging her so much that I would be writing about it for an upcoming blog. She agreed.
I'm far from perfect, and am currently working on some big things right now, but I have learned a lot in our 10 years, and it was and is such a joy to share that knowledge with a young bride.
I was on Instagram the other evening and saw a video. It was an intro to a marriage conference. They were taking a minute to congratulate the oldest marriages. So a handful of couples were standing at this point. The man on the stage asked those who had been married 50 years to remain standing, so those under 50 would sit down. They call out another number or two. A few remain. He finally says, '68 years' for fun. One couple remains. 'The winners,' they are then asked how long they have been married. The wife answers, '72 years.' The man on stage, along with everyone in the auditorium, is amazed. They received a standing ovation. I started to cry, and every time I think about the video, I cry. I went to the comment section for fun. All beautiful comments. One of my thoughts was about how much wisdom they must have to share. It blessed me so much. I am so grateful that the people who posted the video did, because there is enough noise from the enemy on the internet, so we need more good news. Like the possibility of staying happily married for 72 years. I wonder how many marriages have been ministered to by that marriage over the years. It makes me humbly wonder how many marriages and young singles who desire to be married will be ministered to by my marriage, by God's grace.
All in all, it was a blessing to start speaking into a new marriage of two young believers, and I hope God brings more my way. I have given advice to other young brides-to-be, but unbelievers. Which also has its place, but it's a totally different ball game to give advice to a young believer who loves the Lord.
Believing wives, if you have never experienced giving advice to a younger believing wife. I expect you have already though, I think most of the married woman who read my blog are older than me. But still. Pray and ask God to bring you someone to speak to. It will bless you more than you can imagine, and of course, it will help the new couple as well.
I pray this blesses and encourages you today, friend.
God Bless
~Hannah
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